“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.”
Matthew 7:7-8
Asking is one of the most awkward things in the world to do. Whether it be for help or for someone to do or give something to you, it is weird to ask for something.
On the other hand, at least for me, helping isn’t weird. Giving someone something when you are able to isn’t weird. Answering isn’t weird…unless the answer is no.
And that is the crux of the matter: The no.
The reason people don’t ask, the reason asking is awkward is “No.”
When there is a certainty of affirmation, of a “Yes”, we are more comfortable asking. Look at little children they ask for everything and anything, because the idea of not getting it is not in their mind. As we grow older we learn somethings we will not be given due to age or whatever limitations exists for us. Others we will not be given due to financial constraints or some fundamental restrictions. There will be somethings we won’t get because they belong to others and somethings we won’t get just because.
All these reasons play in my mind every time I want to ask for something, especially as I grow older.
When you understand where your everything is as an adult, even when people are willing to make the sacrifices needed for you to get what you want (for me at least) you don’t want them to.
But that is ridiculous.
You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take and not asking because you might get a no is not a good way to live your life. You need to learn to respect the no and move on.
That means you can’t put all your eggs in one basket, you can’t put all your anticipation on one person and hope and pray that they will be your hope.
That is also the reason why sometimes being asked is awkward. If you are unable to help, or give something, or do something and the person asking you is desperate for it you begin to feel bad, like it is your fault.
I think what we need to do is be willing to ask for what we want but be ready to accept a no and move on. Have a second step, plan, idea for if the no does come.
Also, if someone asks you something and you the answer is no, stand on that no and don’t budge for anything.
Don’t be scared to ask, but don’t be so desperate for a yes and if you are asked don’t be desperate to say a yes if you can’t.
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This is something that is a little weird about people and their thoughts that I have seen in my life. If you enjoy it leave a like or a comment.
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